ʼTwas the night before Christmas, and all through the land
The West lived in anxiety over the tyranny at hand.
People hung stockings, many resigned to despair:
After eight years of hope-and-change, a promise that proved bare.
The snowFLAKES were nestled in their parents’ basements:
College educated, yes, yet unable to afford apartments.
And I, wearing my “Make America Great Again” cap,
Had just settled in for some TV and—maybe—a nap.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I turned off Fox News to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon illuminated a layer of the new-fallen snow
Covering our land disgraced by a president who’s a commie pinko.
But then, I glanced up to the sky…and what did appear?
An incoming sleigh and eight powerful reindeer!
With a 70 year-old driver, who is still lively and quick,
I knew who he really was, but we’ll call him “St. Nick”.
With a cadre of reindeer, hand-picked for acclaim,
St. Nick whistled and shouted and called them by name:
“Now, Tillerson! Now, Carson! Now, Mattis! Now, DeVos!
On, Halley! On, Sessions! On, Bannon! On, Priebus!
To undoing executive orders! To a military without par!
So much to restore, but I know we’ll go far!”
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The excellent footwork of each little hoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.
“Welcome to my home Mr. Tr—…uh, I mean St. Nick.
With all your responsibilities I suppose you’ll need to leave quick.”
“Nonsense,” the elf said. “I have come for a chat!
You look rather glum, friend. Tell me: What’s up with that?”
“St. Nick,” I said with a grim, forlorn gaze,
“My fear is that the West is in Her final days.
Economies crumbling, each day a terrorist attack…
We gave the world Shakespeare, Jefferson, Patton…we want all of that back!”
Raising a peremptory finger high in the air,
St. Nick halted my rail with a resolute stare.
“After eight years of hopelessness it’s time to dispel!
I’ve come not to save you, but to allow the great to excel.”
“Think of the progress already the past year:
The UK did Brexit; the end of the European Union is near!
And although the election was a nailbiter—quite vexing—
Hillary will remain in Chappaqua…nowhere close to the West Wing.”
“But this I admonish!” he said with a roar.
“The West has one last chance, and not a single chance more!
If this time you exhibit weakness, defeat or languishing,
All the West has built will devolve to absolutely nothing.”
“America must be made great again for all of Humanity.
It starts with personal responsibility and restoring sanity.”
And laying a finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team give a whistle,
And away they all flew to begin making America once again special.
But I heard him exclaim, as they drove out of sight,
“Always believe in your limitless potential, and all will be right.”